Flat White

Clementine Ford prepares to launch beauty line?

29 April 2020

12:07 PM

29 April 2020

12:07 PM

Lockdown has done funny things to many people. We’re seeing hidden talents emerge as a by-product of not being allowed to leave the house. We’re also seeing some opportunistic brand pivoting, which we can only assume is paving the way for a glittering bridge of opportunity out the other side of this crisis.  

Let’s take extremist far-left exhibitionist feminist Clementine Ford, for instance.  

We’re used to seeing her peddling her foul brand of man-hating misandry on whichever platform is so desperate for clicks they’ll publish her unhelpful bile.  

But who would have thought that our Clem had her sights on her own beauty line? 

In between continuing to churn out her divisive rhetoric, blabbing on about “men’s violence against women”, she’s taken to beauty blogging.

Gap tooth models have been big before — think Lauren Hutton.

Yes, it is weird.   

Amongst angry fear-mongering, such as asking, “What are women in this country to do? These men don’t care about the consequences. They don’t kill women believing they’ll get away with it. That isn’t the purpose. The purpose is to end her life, plain and simple.”

We’ve seen her make it clear what lies ahead for her son writing, “No son of mine will grow up thinking a woman exists to serve him,” alongside a photo of her son loading a washing machine. He is three years old.

And, we’ve also seen her indulge in utterly bizarre 14-minute long makeup tutorials which she’s added the hashtag “fun” too (clearly in an attempt to assist her sheeple in understanding what the hell is going on) 

“I’ve been wild for glitter and makeup and colourful clothes for as long as I can remember,” she wrote. “My favourite colour is pink, followed closely by any shade of pastel. I like having fun with my aesthetic. And I think that, as much as any of us can truly make choices in a capitalist patriarchy, I am drawn to these things predominantly for my own enjoyment…”

B.I.Z.A.R.R.E.

Is Clem hoping for freebies –or preparing to launch her own beauty line in her ongoing fight against patriarchy? 

Can we look forward to ‘Liberating Liner’, a #KillAllMen range of nail polishes and perhaps an Eau de Twitter Rant signature fragrance?  

Illustration: Facebook.

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