manners
Manners maketh America
When I moved to New York in 2005 to be the Daily Telegraph’s correspondent, the first thing I was struck…
Dear Mary: How can I accept a party invitation when I don’t know who’s going?
Q. I know it is rude to ask, when invited to a dinner party, ‘who else is coming?’ I assumed,…
Dear Mary: How do I greet friends without hugs or handshakes?
Q. Now we are instructed to mingle again, I’m sure I’m not alone in being surprised to find an awkwardness…
Dear Mary: is it OK to drop by to see a friend’s garden during the pandemic?
Q. I own a small, somewhat shabby and antiquated but well-located flat in central London which I have been happy…
Dear Mary: What is the etiquette about watching graphic sex scenes as a family?
Q. Please can you tell me the correct etiquette about signing the visitors book after you are married? Obviously you…
Dear Mary: Why don’t my neighbours appreciate my 8 p.m. Thursday firework?
Q. For me the hallmark of a really close friend is someone with whom you feel comfortable enough to bring…
Dear Mary: What do I say to the neighbour who comments on my daily exercise?
Q To your correspondent with a guest whose table manners offend (2 May), you suggest screening him off with a…
Dear Mary: How do I handle my lockdown guest’s lack of table manners?
Q. I am being driven to distraction by a touchy relation who has responded to the lockdown by WhatsApping me…
‘Social distance shaming’ is getting nasty
Rudeness is spreading like a virus
Dear Mary: How do I get out of bossy chain emails?
Q. Each day while working from home, I have at least one hour-long meeting via Zoom. One of my colleagues…
Dear Mary: How can I self-isolate without people bothering me on Zoom?
Q. Caught in Switzerland as the ski resort shut down around my ears, and feeling like a walking health hazard,…
Dear Mary: How can I stop my family scoffing our coronavirus chocolate stockpile?
Q. How can I stop a member of the household from glutting out on the chocolate supply I have stockpiled?…
Dear Mary: Should I return my pod coffee maker on moral grounds?
Q. I adore doing jigsaws and these days there’s an added bonus — by posting my progress on Instagram I…
Dear Mary: As an actor, how do I cope with strangers who think they know me?
Q. I have hired a private room in a restaurant in order to give dinner to a large number of…
Dear Mary: How can I stop my mother-in-law sitting on newspaper whenever she comes to my house?
Q. When my mother-in-law visits, she puts newspaper on a dining chair before sitting down. I’m so speechless that someone…
Dear Mary: How can I stop other diners eating my chips?
Q. My husband and I are committed Brexiteers. For many years we have regularly enjoyed friendly bridge evenings with a…
Dear Mary, from Joan Collins: How do I stop fans asking for selfies in the powder room?
From Dame Joan CollinsQ. Invariably, when I escape to the ladies’ room or powder room or restroom (whatever the current…
Dear Mary: What can we do about our son’s girlfriend’s appalling table manners?
Q. My son has a girlfriend who we like but who has appalling table manners. They come to stay most…
Dear Mary: How do I stop getting lumbered with the washing up on weekends away?
Q. A friend, who is very careful with his money, occasionally invites a group of six to eight out to…
Dear Mary: Is my brother being gaslighted by his boss?
Q. My brilliant brother, who graduated last year, could find nowhere to live in London so we were all delighted…
Dear Mary: How can I stop my neighbour making weird noises when he exercises in the garden?
Q. I sing soprano in a small church choir, ten to 12 singers. The woman I am placed next to…
Dear Mary: How can I tell a man at yoga class to cover up?
Q. My sister runs a yoga school and a middle-aged gentleman has joined. Although she is delighted to encourage male…
Dear Mary: How do I cope with university flatmates who can’t cook?
Q. For many years I employed around 60 people with whom I worked in an open-plan office. I moved on from…
Dear Mary: What can I do about the vexatious racket of windchimes?
Q. I took an old friend to Bellamy’s for lunch. We were just settling in for a proper gossip when…
Dear Mary: How do I stop men sending me articles from the Guardian?
Q. It is difficult to know what to do when homeless people ask you for cash as you are leaving…