Flat White

How the Greens don’t get capitalism yet star at self interest

27 April 2019

2:06 PM

27 April 2019

2:06 PM

The Greens, it would be fair to say, don’t understand captialism.

Equally, it would be approprate to say that advertising is one of the most capitalistic industries. It’s aim is to create new markets for your goods and services.

So, if the Greens don’t get capitalism, they certainly aren’t going to understand the principals of advertising.

And, after a boring fortnight of campaigning, they intend to give us all a laugh by wasting a lot of money just to prove our point.

This plea landed in the inboxes of Greens suppoters this morning:

Well, of course. The Greens need to get their message to Guardian readers. They’d vote for Fraser Annining or be desperately searching the ballot paper for Citizen Electoral Council candidates otherwise.

Not only are the Greens preaching to the converted.

It’s our thesis from the top of our story, QED.

Well, QED – amost.

There’s the matter of that “Donate now” button. The Greens want to waste other people’s money.

It’s as if the people at the very top of the tree at least grasp concepts such as “a fool and their money are soon parted” (except, of course, with a gender neutral word instead of that “their”.

They want the punters to hand over, er, zir dosh – as another Greens fundraising email proves.

Just last night, they were passing around the fairtrade non-exploitedly hand woven sutainable rattan begging bowl with another email, this one on behalf of that down and outer Julian Burnside.

Now, his excellency – or whatever he likes fellow Melbourne millionaire battler bolsheviks like Eric Beecher and Morry Schwartz to call him – must be one of the wealthiest candidates running at this eelection.

He has an extensive property portfolio worth some $20 million.

Can’t he just dump some of that to pay for his campaign? He may even accrues some attractive tax breaks on the way.

Apprently not. This is another case where the Greens powers that be want the little people to cough up the dough.

Now, this publication may have been a little harsh on Malcolm Turnbull over the years, but unlike the Greens’ stringpullers and The Great Humanitarian (yea, he who even walks among us although we are not worthy), he put his money where his mouth was. Quite a lot of it, actually.

He paid for his campaigns, his party’s and his won – but you can bet didn’t waste any of it taking over the website of the Wentworth Courier to tell his local Liberals what they knew already.

Illustration: Richard Di Natale/Twitter.

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