The Spectator

Letters

7 December 2013 9:00 am

Climate scientists write… Sir: Lord Lawson has written in his diary (30 November) under the online summary headline ‘my secret…

The 2013 Michael Heath Award for cartooning

7 December 2013 9:00 am

The winner of the first ever Michael Heath award for cartooning is Len Hawkins. One of his drawings appears below.…

Books and Arts

7 December 2013 9:00 am

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‘Let’s elope to Gretna Green to separate.’

Scottish

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘Hello, we’re trying to find somewhere we can smoke…’

Smoking

7 December 2013 9:00 am

Religious

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘You open the door and hundreds of thousands of Bulgarians come flooding through.’

Calendar

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘OK. Can we make that the last time you refer to Christmas as “Black Wednesday”?’

Christmas

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘We’re still looking into it, but we’re pretty sure it stands for “Kind, Friendly, Courteous” chicken farm.’

Chickens

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘If I were you I’d forget about it.’

Dementia

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘Can we cut all the green crap?’

Green

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘Since the galley had new Spanish owners, the rhythm of the galley slaves had gone haywire.’

Galley

7 December 2013 9:00 am

Sale

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘It’s the Belmonts. They’ve found a potato from their allotment that looks like Elvis, do we want to go round?’

Elvis

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘Sweetheart, would you like to tweet grace?’

Tweet

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘Next time they offer us something to make our lives more comfortable, let me do the talking.’

Lava

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘Henceforth to be known as Frackland...’

Frackland

7 December 2013 9:00 am

Michelangelo

7 December 2013 9:00 am

doors

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘I’d like to book a mountain rescue team for 8pm’

Mountain

7 December 2013 9:00 am

‘I’d like to book a mountain rescue team for 8pm’

Sink

7 December 2013 9:00 am

Our enemy is not global warming. In Britain, people are dying of the cold

30 November 2013 9:00 am

Fanciful predictions of all the deaths that will result from climate change, decades into the future, are regularly thrown into…

The Co-op Bank has taken on board a new chairman. He assures us that he has never taken ketamine, cannabis, crystal meth or GHB, that he has no idea what a rent boy is, and that he has never met Ed Balls.

Portrait of the week

30 November 2013 9:00 am

Home Alex Salmond, the First Minister of Scotland, outlined Scottish National Party plans for independence, which included keeping the pound…

Barometer

30 November 2013 9:00 am

Third-class thinking A report by the Institute of Economic Affairs recommended standing-room-only third-class carriages as an alternative to longer trains…

The 2013 Michael Heath Award for cartooning — shortlist (part 2)

30 November 2013 9:00 am

Nine cartoonists are shortlisted for the first ever Michael Heath Award for cartooning. The theme of the contest, sponsored by…