Real life
When the vet had finished giving my horses their annual flu boosters, she reminded me the vaccination regime had changed.…
Real life
The bank was having Transgender Visibility Day when I popped in to deposit some cash.The stressed-looking customers, meanwhile, seemed mostly…
Real life
My friend Emily, who once got an owl stuck to her hand, was bringing her son for a day with…
Real life
Since recovering from Covid, I seem to have quietly been developing supernatural powers. At first I thought I had simply…
Real life
The window of the new shop was as brightly coloured as a circus entrance, and stuffed full of items bearing…
Real life
The lodger looked at me blankly and pronounced wearily, as though intoning something he was tired of parroting, that I…
Real life
‘This is my father, and his pronoun is he,’ said the builder boyfriend, checking his dad into Accident and Emergency.…
Real life
Trees glorious trees. People can’t get enough of them. They don’t want to take care of trees, they just want…
Real life
‘A diary?’ said the lady in the chintzy gift shop, pronouncing the word very much as Edith Evans said ‘handbag’…
Real life
‘Do you have any questions?’ said the man at the insurance company after an hour of me trying to take…
Real life
After most of Islington moved to Wales, it was foolish of me to think about following. But the need to…
Real life
After an incredible 13 emails, Vodafone decided that I was who I was claiming to be, and refunded my money.…
Real life
After launching an investigation into my missing phone, Vodafone informed me it could not deal with me any further until…
Real life
‘Can I ask you why you don’t want a smart phone?’ said the chirpy manager, as I stood blinking in…
Real life
One of the village vegans gave the bacon sandwich resting on top of the recycling bin outside my house an…
Real life
Last night I dreamt I went on holiday again. It seemed to me I stood by the departure gate, and…
Real life
Someone else with my name is wreaking havoc with my attempts to control the Twitter account I don’t want. Obviously,…
Real life
‘Did you hear it?’ said a friend of mine, red-faced with the flush of a piece of news she couldn’t…
Real life
The streetlighting engineer walked up and down outside my house trying to work out who was right: me, or my…
Real life
Surprise, surprise. The person who had the shield taken out of the street light so it shone back into my…
Real life
The street lamp as bright as the Dog Star is back to its full glare outside my house. I won…
Real life
We were enjoying our evening at the overpriced gastropub until a woman in a dark uniform appeared at our table.…
Real life
My pro-vaxxer friends have been a lot nicer to me since they started testing positive for Covid. I’m calling my…
Real life
‘My phone says I can’t go out until Tuesday, so I can’t come and meet you,’ said my friend. And…
Real life
We had gone to visit a friend at a stable yard on a country estate on a crisp autumn Sunday.…
