Real life
‘I need an ambulance!’ yelled the builder boyfriend into his mobile phone as the cyclist lay bleeding from a head…
Real life
‘What are you going to put on my head to protect me?’ said the man outside the barber’s shop to…
Real life
‘Are you seriously telling me you would rather meet up on Zoom than in reality?’ I asked a friend as…
Real Life
My friend turned up wearing a snorkelling mask, beneath which she had tied a bandana around her mouth. On her…
Real life
‘Have you met the man who keeps his horses in this field?’ said one silver-haired lady to the other, as…
Real life
Opting out of organ donation was one of the hardest things I’ve done in a while. I don’t mean the…
Real life
The two horses looked like they had never seen anything like it. They had wound up in a dark car…
Real life
We went on our first outing, to the beach at Littlehampton, but I’m not sure it was as stress-relieving as…
Garden leave
It’s hell when the whole neighbourhood is working from home
Real life
We arrived at the country store with only three minutes to closing time so our chances of scoring horse wormer…
Real life
When people ask me what I did during lockdown, I would like to give an inspiring answer, apart from growing…
Real life
If this lockdown doesn’t end soon we are all going to turn into hairy lefties. I have just cut the…
Real life
The rain showers had a strange and wondrous effect. All the cyclists, joggers and dog walkers that were coming from…
Real life
Without making any efforts in that direction, I now know all about a certain telecom firm’s future business plans. My…
Real life
The man was unloading cycles from the boot of his car just as I was about to take the turning…
Real Life
The toad who lives at the bottom of the garden in the pile of bricks beneath the potting table was…
Real life
‘Do you want some of the private stuff from out the back?’ said the butcher to the builder boyfriend, leaning…
Real life
The spaniel curled up in her basket with one of my shoes, one of his socks and a packet of…
Real life
‘Get me Heygates on the phone! I need that order of pony nuts now, damn it!’ It was like a…
Real life
The most exciting place on earth I have ever been to is the village where I live. And I don’t…
Real Life
The game was up when I put on a pair of size 14 jodhpurs at the country store and they…
Real Life
One of the many technological things I don’t understand is, how come I’m paying to watch television? I know why…
Pet peeve
Let animals be animals
Real life
Nice of the NHS to send an advisory text about coronavirus, because I was wondering. Is it possible to have…
Real life
Mr Benn has been in touch because he wants a right of reply to an article I wrote about my…
