‘You both need to start saving up...My Christmas list.’

List

26 July 2014 9:00 am

‘Me Tarzan...King of the...’

Tarzan

26 July 2014 9:00 am

‘This is where the class struggle really starts.’

Class

26 July 2014 9:00 am

‘Writer’s block.’

Writer

26 July 2014 9:00 am

‘In light of these figures, I will be doing the honourable thing and standing on someone.’

Figures

19 July 2014 9:00 am

‘If women can be bishops, I want to be a synchronised swimmer.’

Swimmer

19 July 2014 9:00 am

Inspection

19 July 2014 9:00 am

‘It’s a Philip Treacy mitre.’

Mitre

19 July 2014 9:00 am

‘Oh my goodness! Four and twenty, you say?’

Rspb

19 July 2014 9:00 am

Obesity

19 July 2014 9:00 am

Dying

19 July 2014 9:00 am

Selfies

19 July 2014 9:00 am

‘Not that one, dear — that’s the design classic. Use the one that works.’

Classic

19 July 2014 9:00 am

Business

19 July 2014 9:00 am

‘When you said “The Ring”, I thought you meant Wagner.’

Ring

19 July 2014 9:00 am

‘I can’t stand her “more vintage than thou” attitude.’

Vintage

19 July 2014 9:00 am

‘My Dad made it himself but I get the feeling he’s never seen “Iron Man”.’

Birthday

19 July 2014 9:00 am

‘It doesn’t matter that he can’t talk now that he’s texting me.’

Text

19 July 2014 9:00 am

‘I am getting definite blackcurrant notes.’

Ribena

19 July 2014 9:00 am

‘What an amazing spectacle! Cyclists not on the pavement!’

Tour

12 July 2014 9:00 am

‘Not another old episode of Jihad’s Army?!’

Tv

12 July 2014 9:00 am

‘Modern audiences don’t just sit and watch — we interact and post live comments.’

Globe

12 July 2014 9:00 am

Cow

12 July 2014 9:00 am

‘I’ll say this for heather, it’s very moorish.’

Pheasants

12 July 2014 9:00 am

‘Does sir dress to the left or to the right?’

Tshirts

12 July 2014 9:00 am