‘I know my expectations of heaven shouldn’t have been so high but this is ridiculous..’

Heaven

24 January 2015 9:00 am

‘We thought about a conservatory but decided this would add more value to the property.’

Property

24 January 2015 9:00 am

‘Dad, what’s a pencil?’

Pencil

24 January 2015 9:00 am

‘So can I put you down as holding us in slightly less contempt than the others, then?’

Down

24 January 2015 9:00 am

‘You may now sext the bride.’

Bride

24 January 2015 9:00 am

‘OK, gentlemen, enough beard envy.’

Beard

24 January 2015 9:00 am

‘So, that’s bamboo, bamboo, bamboo, bamboo, bamboo, bamboo. And for you, Sir?’

Bamboo

24 January 2015 9:00 am

‘No, this is flocking. Stampeding is on the 29th floor.’

Flocking

24 January 2015 9:00 am

Spartacus

24 January 2015 9:00 am

‘I’ve heard of Hilary Mantel – but who is this Henry VIII?’

Wolf hall

24 January 2015 9:00 am

Miliband

24 January 2015 9:00 am

‘Isn’t that nice? It’s a gift from the Jehovah’s Witnesses to apologise for being so annoying and pushy earlier today.’

Trojan horse

24 January 2015 9:00 am

Marine

17 January 2015 9:00 am

‘Of course it was just a shell when I moved in.’

Snail

17 January 2015 9:00 am

Mansion

17 January 2015 9:00 am

Rock

17 January 2015 9:00 am

‘I’m just trying to find myself.’

Wally

17 January 2015 9:00 am

Looks

17 January 2015 9:00 am

Pen

17 January 2015 9:00 am

Leap

17 January 2015 9:00 am

Visit

17 January 2015 9:00 am

‘I appreciate you not wearing the red sweater this week, Doc.’

Bull

17 January 2015 9:00 am

Chicken

17 January 2015 9:00 am

Jihadi

17 January 2015 9:00 am

‘So, you’re a cartoonist — can you actually survive doing that?’

Cartoonist

17 January 2015 9:00 am

1 … 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 … 159

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