‘We must remember to send the Johnsons a death threat.’

Death threat

25 April 2015 9:00 am

Ark

25 April 2015 9:00 am

‘We’re worried he may be addicted to online porn.’

Addicted

25 April 2015 9:00 am

Hello

25 April 2015 9:00 am

Lib Dem

25 April 2015 9:00 am

‘Oh, Malcolm — is this a raft of proposals?’

Proposals

25 April 2015 9:00 am

Romance

25 April 2015 9:00 am

Fridge magnet

Magnet

25 April 2015 9:00 am

‘I can’t stand Labour party electioneering. What’s on ITV?’

TV

25 April 2015 9:00 am

Krill

25 April 2015 9:00 am

‘Apparently she used to be a city tour guide.’

Bo Peep

25 April 2015 9:00 am

‘Is Ed Miliband actually talking or is it Nicola Sturgeon doing his voice?’

BGT

25 April 2015 9:00 am

This is Jason, my ghostwriter. Jason, dear, she wants my autograph.’

Writer

18 April 2015 9:00 am

Advisors

18 April 2015 9:00 am

Hatton Garden

18 April 2015 9:00 am

‘Post is late again.’

Leaflet

18 April 2015 9:00 am

‘Wow! That service was quick.’

Murray

18 April 2015 9:00 am

‘Is it something I said, tweeted, retweeted, posted on Facebook, blogged, skyped, texted, snapchatted, emailed or facetimed?’

Said

18 April 2015 9:00 am

Scam

18 April 2015 9:00 am

Butterfly

18 April 2015 9:00 am

‘They have so much in common.’

Ipad

18 April 2015 9:00 am

Neptune

18 April 2015 9:00 am

‘They’re moving the production to the Far East.’

Dagenham

18 April 2015 9:00 am

Bus

18 April 2015 9:00 am

‘We can’t vote for her — she wasn’t locally sourced.’

Green

18 April 2015 9:00 am