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‘Least said, texted, tweeted, retweeted, Instagrammed, posted, uploaded, shared, blogged, vlogged and Snapchatted, soonest mended.’
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‘Who funds you?’
‘Sloppily presented, barely reasoned, platitudes
and regurgitated non-facts — Pennington Minor, you have a future as a politician...’
‘It sounded a lot nicer in the brochure.’
‘We’ve created additional space
by getting rid of the books.’
‘When a butterfly flaps its wings in China, Speaker Bercow says something in Westminster.’
‘He was tweeting too much so I blocked him.’
Waiting for Brexit
‘It’s true, knife crime is getting worse.’
‘I’m stockpiling for Brexit, and in the event of
no Brexit, I’m stockpiling for Corbyn.’