KJ Lamb

‘You will bring forth a son – so no need for a gender reveal party.’

KJ Lamb 7 November 2026 9:00 am

‘We’re not the weird sisters any more – we’re the neurodivergent sisters.’

KJ Lamb 31 October 2026 9:00 am

The chef recommends

KJ Lamb 31 October 2026 9:00 am

‘They’re playing mummies and daddies.’

KJ Lamb 17 October 2026 9:00 am

‘Let’s talk about your hoarding and concealing food issues.’

KJ Lamb 3 October 2026 9:00 am

‘Your son was caught behind the bike shed enjoying a full English.’

KJ Lamb 19 September 2026 9:00 am

‘You are going online to complain about your journey.’

KJ Lamb 12 September 2026 9:00 am

‘Maybe leave out the bit about the barbecue.’

KJ Lamb 22 August 2026 9:00 am

‘Ron prefers horizontal drinking.’

KJ Lamb 15 August 2026 9:00 am

‘Do I have to spell it out? Because I can’t.’

KJ Lamb 8 August 2026 9:00 am

‘You are banned for contravening our safeguarding policy.’

KJ Lamb 1 August 2026 9:00 am

‘He’s not the messiah, he’s a very northern boy.’

KJ Lamb 25 July 2026 9:00 am

Une hosepipe

KJ Lamb 18 July 2026 9:00 am

‘You call that a great fall?’

KJ Lamb 4 July 2026 9:00 am

‘I’ve redacted in order to protect identities.’

KJ Lamb 27 June 2026 9:00 am

‘He’s been sent home for politicising the egg and spoon race.’

KJ Lamb 20 June 2026 9:00 am

‘I’d like my upper lip stiffened, but leave a wobble in the lower one to show I’m in touch with my emotions.’

KJ Lamb 13 June 2026 9:00 am

Guess the name of the next PM

KJ Lamb 30 May 2026 9:00 am

‘I’m sorry, Marjorie – I just don’t have the headspace for this.’

KJ Lamb 23 May 2026 9:00 am

‘Norman would like you to set a timetable for your departure.’

KJ Lamb 23 May 2026 9:00 am

‘This is Kevin – my personal shoplifter.’

KJ Lamb 9 May 2026 9:00 am

‘I’m worried that people won’t like me now they’re finding out about my dark side’

KJ Lamb 11 April 2026 9:00 am

‘Would you like a non-overtly-Christian hot bun?’

KJ Lamb 4 April 2026 9:00 am

‘So, what’s our next move?’

KJ Lamb 21 March 2026 9:00 am

‘Well everyone – Norman’s definitely a man.’

KJ Lamb 14 March 2026 9:00 am

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