Life
My B&B guests keep stealing my books
‘Please do NOT wash up!’ reads the makeshift sign I have fixed above the kitchen sink. It instructs our B&B…
A tale of two Martins
Provence The canicule broke yesterday, heralding the end of high summer. Wild figs and mulberries litter the path, filling the…
A fictional Edwardian waif’s hungry fantasy: Fortnum & Mason’s food hall reviewed
I like a picnic weighted with history and class terror, which means Fortnum & Mason on Piccadilly, which is historical…
Death was easier when I was a kid
Somebody dies and his friends say ‘he passed’. Passed what? He didn’t pass. He failed. He took the most basic…
QPR’s downward spiral
Charlie, my 17-year-old son, was hopeful about QPR’s chances this season. True, we managed to avoid relegation only by the…
Dear Mary: How do I get a Lycra-wearing cyclist to dress for drinks?
Q. A good friend often cycles over when I invite him for drinks. The trouble is he insists on turning…
Good riddance to the traditional sports bar
They used to be places that reeked of testosterone, sweat and male egos, their floors sticky with lager spilled by…
What should you call a ‘boy cow’ and a ‘lady dog’?
‘That’s a boy cow,’ said a woman in the train to a little girl, adding in an aside to an…
Being a jockey is a tough ride
It has been quite some year for jockey-churning, the latest example being the mid-season decision by owner-breeder Imad Al Sagar…
The high price of a free breakfast
‘Do you want the good news or the bad news about the Germans?’ I asked, and then I offered a…
Spectator Competition: Ad it up
For Competition 3414 you were invited to provide an extract from a well-known literary work rewritten to include appropriate product…
Aussie life
The vote to cut HECs debt just went through parliament. Clever politics targeting the youth vote yet all I remember…
Language
A Speccie reader (Noel) wants to know if the media is using ‘decimated’ correctly, when a commenter calls on Hamas…
Aussie life
One Sunday morning in 1952, the pilot of a light aircraft flying low over the Pilbara looked down and saw…
Language
Our esteemed editor asks about the word ‘irits’. Is it, he asks, British or American or authentically Aussie. The good…
Vodka that makes an excellent aperitif
Jack Gervaise-Brazier is a restless romantic. He was brought up on Guernsey, which filled him with a love of islands,…
My plan for a wealth tax – with a difference
Reading Careless People, an exposé of life within Facebook written by a Kiwi, it occurred to me that one potential…
Dear Mary: How do we avoid having dinner with our new cruise friends every night?
Q. My twins’ birthday is coming up, but we will be in the country. Their godparents are usually punctilious, but…
