Humour
Melissa Kite: The death of humour
A vet has accused me of a ‘hate crime’ for making a joke about vets. On the basis that everything…
Christmas quiz books galore
There can be few challenges more daunting for the assiduous reviewer than a pile of Christmas ‘gift’ books sitting on…
How can I prevent my husband from burning all my post?
If you don’t yet watch Gogglebox on Channel 4, start doing so now. Far from making you despise our couch-potato…
Dear Mary
Q. What is the etiquette of hospital visiting? A friend in his fifties is about to spend six weeks in…
The
Veronica, who looks at Twitter, told me of an exchange she thought would interest me, about the use of the.…
Dear Mary
Q. A well-known television mogul,whom I had met only once, came to dinner at my house. I was on good…
RIP Gussie, my plainspoken llama
Gussie is the name of a grumpy and ill-natured llama, her coat largely white and somewhat unkempt, and much given…
Your problems solved
Q. I know it’s a gaffe to ask a doctor for medical advice at a party, but what is the…
More blood and tears
Irvine Welsh’s 1993 debut novel Train-spotting flicked a hearty V-sign in the face of alarm-clock Britain. ‘Ah choose no tae…
Your problems solved
Q. Re. your letter from F.C. about the boyfriend leaving lids off (20 February), I have a similar problem. My husband…
Your problems solved
Q. Former colleagues, with whom I got on very well in the context of the office, are buying a house…
Your problems solved
Q. I love my boyfriend but he has a terrible habit I was unaware of before he moved in. If…
Dear Mary
Q. We have two granddaughters working hard and happily at university. It is our pleasure to give them some cash…
Your problems solved
Q. What can be done when more people than you can cater for accept an invitation? We are giving a…
Dear Mary
I have been alone in the country this festive season as my adult children and most of my friends are…
Osbert Lancaster: a national treasure rediscovered
True to his saw that ours is ‘a land of rugged individualists’, Osbert Lancaster, in his self-appointed role of popular…
Dear Mary: How to stop someone from giving my tiny children expensive clothes that they never wear?
Q. Is there a tactful way to deter certain people from buying clothing for one’s tiny children as Christmas presents?…
Diary
Scientists are experimenting with growing replacement vocal cords in the lab, as well as transplanting them from dogs. That was…
There’s a right way to lose at the Oxford Union. I did the wrong way
The way not to win a debate at the Oxford Union, I’ve just discovered, is to start your speech with…
The secret brilliance of Prince Philip’s ‘gaffes’
I’ve just been on the receiving end of a Prince Philip gaffe, of sorts, and I loved it. It was…
To wit, deWitt
Patrick deWitt is a Canadian writer whose second novel, a picaresque and darkly comic western called The Sisters Brothers, was…
Love, loneliness and all that jazz
Woody Allen (born Allan Stewart Konigsberg), the prolific, Oscar-winning auteur, New Orleans-style jazz clarinettist, doyen of New York delicatessen society,…
Nimble-witted wanderer
It was a certain unforgettable ex-girlfriend, Harry Mount confesses — named only as ‘S’ in his dedication — who came…
Poison and parsnip wine
First, a quote from the novel under review. The context: it is a flashback scene of the behaviour of a…
Dear Mary
Q. After a recent dinner I found myself on a two-seater sofa enjoying the restful company of a woman who…
