Etiquette
Dear Mary: how can I stop guests waking too early?
Q. I meet a very old and dear friend for lunch on a regular basis. We meet at a lovely…
Dear Mary: Should you flush the loo in the night when staying with friends?
Q. We live in an area with no mobile reception and trying to get hold of taxis for guests leaving…
Dear Mary: How do I shake off charity collectors?
Q. A friend, who I love dearly and who comes to stay a lot, has always been unforthcoming with gifts.…
Dear Mary: How do I avoid my neighbours on holiday?
Q. We have some neighbours who we don’t mind at all – they are perfectly nice, just not part of…
Do I have too many friends?
Can one have too many friends? I asked myself this question as we prepared yet another dinner party for ten…
Dear Mary: how do I hide my pregnancy from my boozy friends?
Q. We love having friends to stay at our house in Cornwall. One particular guest has the habit of arriving…
Dear Mary: how can I deter the creep at my pub quiz?
Q. I have been pitched into a social dilemma regarding Glyndebourne, which I live near to but don’t go to…
Dear Mary: how do I set up two young people?
Q. I have invited some younger friends to stay with me at a family house in Spain. Among the party…
Dear Mary: How do I keep my phone safe on the beach?
Q. My husband and I have just been on a wonderful long weekend abroad to a friend’s 60th birthday. We…
Dear Mary: Help! My teeth are too white
Q. I ride a bike from Chiswick to the City each morning. It is a ten-mile journey that takes 45…
Dear Mary: is it rude to listen to sport at a wedding?
Q. We live in the countryside, where the door is always open. Last week when it was sunny we had…
Dear Mary: can you leave a party without saying goodbye?
Q. Often at parties strangers bear down on me looking excited and are then offended when I don’t recognise them.…
Dear Mary: how to rumble a snooper
Q. I like and get on well with my sister-in-law. My problem is that she is incredibly nosy and I…
Dear Mary: how can I safeguard my feminist principles at dinner?
Q. My husband and I will shortly be having some South American friends to stay. They come most years and…
Dear Mary: how do I dodge a party to avoid an undesirable guest?
Q. I am on a long, jam-packed and much disrupted train journey to Scotland. In the carriage someone is working…
Dear Mary: how do I stop my book club banging on about their grandchildren?
Q. At the Ludlow Piano Festival, during a Tyler Hay concert, my husband and I spotted a fascinating-looking couple who…
Dear Mary: how do I stop our cousins’ dog peeing on the curtains?
Q. I have a friend whom I see quite often who keeps asking me if I will ‘get her invited’ for…
Dear Mary: how should I thank a friend for dead flowers?
Q. I left fashion school last year and since then I’ve spent most of my time applying for jobs and…
Dear Mary: how can I help pay for an expensive lunch without seeming rude?
Q. My husband and I (both in our eighties) recently visited a carpet shop with a view to replacing the…
Dear Mary: how can I get restaurants to turn off loud music?
Q. My husband never wants to go out to lunch on a day when he could be gardening but he…
Dear Mary: How do I choose who to sponsor for the London Marathon?
Q. For the past couple of years, many of my sons’ friends have been gamely running the London Marathon for…
