Etiquette
Dear Mary: How can I leave a boring WhatsApp group without upsetting anyone?
Q. During lockdown I have done my level best to assist with household chores. Last week, while my wife was…
Dear Mary: Will my lockdown appearance be too off-putting for the office?
Q. Just before Covid, we moved out of London with the intention of having a quiet life in the country.…
Dear Mary: How can I stop predatory kisses at social gatherings?
Q. How can one politely stop predatory kissers? I am (or was) an affectionate and demonstrative person but I don’t…
Dear Mary: How can I accept a party invitation when I don’t know who’s going?
Q. I know it is rude to ask, when invited to a dinner party, ‘who else is coming?’ I assumed,…
Dear Mary: How do I greet friends without hugs or handshakes?
Q. Now we are instructed to mingle again, I’m sure I’m not alone in being surprised to find an awkwardness…
Dear Mary: is it OK to drop by to see a friend’s garden during the pandemic?
Q. I own a small, somewhat shabby and antiquated but well-located flat in central London which I have been happy…
Dear Mary: What is the etiquette about watching graphic sex scenes as a family?
Q. Please can you tell me the correct etiquette about signing the visitors book after you are married? Obviously you…
Dear Mary: Why don’t my neighbours appreciate my 8 p.m. Thursday firework?
Q. For me the hallmark of a really close friend is someone with whom you feel comfortable enough to bring…
Dear Mary: What do I say to the neighbour who comments on my daily exercise?
Q To your correspondent with a guest whose table manners offend (2 May), you suggest screening him off with a…
Dear Mary: How do I handle my lockdown guest’s lack of table manners?
Q. I am being driven to distraction by a touchy relation who has responded to the lockdown by WhatsApping me…
Dear Mary: How do I get out of bossy chain emails?
Q. Each day while working from home, I have at least one hour-long meeting via Zoom. One of my colleagues…
Dear Mary: How can I self-isolate without people bothering me on Zoom?
Q. Caught in Switzerland as the ski resort shut down around my ears, and feeling like a walking health hazard,…
Dear Mary: How much should I pay my cleaner during the lockdown?
Q. Mary, what percentage of cleaners’ normal wages should we pay them when they can’t come in for the foreseeable…
Dear Mary: How can I stop my family scoffing our coronavirus chocolate stockpile?
Q. How can I stop a member of the household from glutting out on the chocolate supply I have stockpiled?…
Dear Mary: How can I foil a notorious place-swapper at my daughter’s wedding?
Q. I am arranging the seating plan for my daughter’s wedding and have a problem with one of her guests…
Dear Mary: Should I return my pod coffee maker on moral grounds?
Q. I adore doing jigsaws and these days there’s an added bonus — by posting my progress on Instagram I…
Dear Mary: Should I tell my friend that his expensive lunch made me ill?
Q. I see a lot of two of our grandchildren because they live in our London house. We are centrally…
Dear Mary: What is the etiquette about kissing during the coronavirus scare?
Q. I am having a drinks party to celebrate the publication of my latest book. I sent out invitations (to…
Dear Mary: As an actor, how do I cope with strangers who think they know me?
Q. I have hired a private room in a restaurant in order to give dinner to a large number of…
Dear Mary: How can I stop my mother-in-law sitting on newspaper whenever she comes to my house?
Q. When my mother-in-law visits, she puts newspaper on a dining chair before sitting down. I’m so speechless that someone…
Dear Mary: How can I stop other diners eating my chips?
Q. My husband and I are committed Brexiteers. For many years we have regularly enjoyed friendly bridge evenings with a…
Dear Mary: How can I hang out with smokers at parties without freezing?
Q. As a young woman I tend not to wear that much to social events in the evening, but I…
Dear Mary, from Joan Collins: How do I stop fans asking for selfies in the powder room?
From Dame Joan CollinsQ. Invariably, when I escape to the ladies’ room or powder room or restroom (whatever the current…
Dear Mary: What can we do about our son’s girlfriend’s appalling table manners?
Q. My son has a girlfriend who we like but who has appalling table manners. They come to stay most…
The unwritten rules of sending Christmas cards
No one sends Christmas cards any more. Except that I do, and you might, and a few other people do…
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