Real life
You can’t always get what you want. And you can never get what you want if you want a phone…
Real life
The ‘I’m Voting For Chuka’ posters in my rich neighbours’ front windows pushed me over the edge. There is nothing…
Real life
In the seemingly endless search for somewhere nice to live in modern Britain, where parking is not subject to martial…
Miliband country
A ‘progressive alliance’ would be a profound threat to rural life
Real life
‘I suppose,’ said my dad philosophically, ‘I could always vote Green.’ ‘Oh, for goodness sake! Not you as well!’ I…
Real life
As a wise person once said (or if they didn’t, they should have), there is only one thing worse than…
Real life
By and large, I’m not really sure the world is ready for me to join the steering committee of a…
Real life
After I phoned the Aviva call centre for the ten thousandth time, a girl called Adele had to sort it…
Real life
Farewell then, Cobham. You were the place I ran to when the metropolis became too much, and urban life overwhelmed…
Real life
The builder boyfriend has a new girlfriend. I suppose he was bound to move on eventually. I just never thought…
Real life
Darcy was obviously listening to every word I said. After we got back from the ride from hell, in which…
Real life
All was going suspiciously well with the thoroughbred. I suppose it had to be the calm before the storm. I…
Real life
My request to see my medical notes was granted in the end. I honestly don’t know why I wanted to…
Real life
My request to see my medical notes has sparked all-out panic at the GP surgery. ‘What do you mean?’ said…
Real life
Never add up your insurance premiums. I just did and the annual cost of all of them came to more…
Click and flick
Romance is being killed off by the brutal marketplace of dating apps such as Tinder
Real life
‘Hello, Vodafone customer s…, can I h…you?’ This is typical, I thought. I’m ringing to complain about them charging me…
The Tooting poisoner
In my London neighbourhood, an argument about urban foxes is turning very nasty indeed
Real life
‘Orange 1-1-8 thousand how may I help you?’ said the cheerful voice. Carefree as you like, I asked for the…
Real life
My iPad is dead, that’s what’s wrong with it. The plumage don’t enter into it. But since the blasted thing…
Real life
My ponies may be psychic. I think they are communicating with each other telepathically. And before you call me delusional,…
Real life
Clearly, I am going to have to report my broken mop handle to the authorities. It has been sitting outside…
Real life
Every accident that happens to a horse is a freak accident. Rule number one. Once you grasp that as a…
Real life
Draft and save. That is as good a New Year’s resolution as any. Never send an email or letter in…
Real life
The countryside is all very well so long as you know you can leave it. Funnily enough, exactly the same…
