Why are artlessly ambiguous headlines called ‘crash blossoms’?
‘Hospitals named after sandwiches kill five,’ ran a headline in the Times in June. When it was tweeted by the…
Surd
Lewis Carroll, in his Phantasmagoria, and Other Poems (1869), constructed a poem that yielded a double acrostic, with the first…
How the language of blackjack crept into Brexit
In the Times, Janice Turner wrote that she had been watching Remainers and Leavers ‘like degenerate gamblers, double down, bet…
What’s the word for a word that’s been used only once?
It is easy to speak a sentence never spoken before since the world came fresh from its mould. It’s not…
Sweaty Betty, Acne: the fashion for nasty brand names
On my way to a party in Ealing I saw a shop called Pan Rings. A mental image popped up…
How did BBC’s Late Night Line-Up get its name?
The title of the television review and discussion programme Late Night Line-Up is a curious one. I’d be interested if…
The link between politics, moisturiser and your air conditioning unit
I asked my husband if I should spend £59 on 20 millilitres of Estée Lauder Advanced Night Repair Intense Reset…
When did ‘big girl’s blouse’ become an insult?
Fotherington-Thomas was introduced by Nigel Molesworth, the narrator of Down with Skool!, in 1953: ‘As you see he is skipping…
Word of the week: ‘prorogue’
It was most unlooked-for that a king should ally with Whig politicians to seek parliamentary reform, but that was what…
Is a cow always a cow?
I’ve noticed a tendency among townies like me to call all cattle cows (which they feel they must mention in…
Are our feelings towards politics apathy or inertia?
My husband, with a dependable appetite for chestnuts, says he would be the ideal person to start an Apathy party.…
What to call an inferior politician?
‘What about poetaster, then?’ asked my husband accusingly, looking up from his whisky and the Spectator, in which I’d ruminated…
Where did Boris Johnson’s ‘gloomsters’ come from?
When Boris Johnson hit out at ‘the doomsters and the gloomsters’, I was willing to believe that the word gloomster…
Is the term ‘Esquire’ U or non-U?
‘I’m a learned doctor,’ cried my husband, pulling at the hems of his tweed coat and doing a little jig.…
From moustache to extremist – the journey of ‘bigot’
How might an oath lend its name in England to a religious extremist and in Spain to a moustache? That…
Must Harry and Meghan’s son really learn to ‘essentialise’ race?
‘Ha, ha,’ said my husband, as though he’d made a joke. ‘Here’s one for you.’ He waved a page of…
The Lib Dems are wrong – it’s ‘ballocks’ to Brexit
I agree with James Joyce on the spelling ballocks. The Liberal Democrats made their MEPs wear T-shirts printed with ‘Bollocks…
Who really invented the word ‘posh’?
Two rules of grammar are certain: never split an infinitive and never end a sentence with a preposition. As for…
Watch out for ‘watch on’
In Casablanca, Mr and Mrs Leuchtag resolve to speak English to each other in preparation for emigration to America. Mr…
The barking world of ‘doggo lingo’
Doggy sounds childish. ‘How much is that doggie in the window?’ asks the popular song. (The song title used the…
How many words were coined by Thomas Browne?
‘How many words will you use today, first used by Thomas Browne in the 17th century?’ asked a trailer on…
The tangled roots of ‘artichoke’
My husband has been growling: ‘You cross-legged hartichoak.’ He tries it on obstructive pedestrians hypnotised by their mobile phones. He…
Just who – or what – are the men in suits?
After he invented the term young fogey (in The Spectator in 1984), the much lamented journalist Alan Watkins coined the…
Why is a book like a sarcophagus?
‘Is it like a packet of fags?’ asked my husband, less annoyingly than usual, but still in some confusion. I…
‘Bolection’ and how the language of architecture was moulded
A pleasant menagerie of words grazes in the field of architectural mouldings (the projecting or incised bands that serve useful…
