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Why Simone de Beauvoir is my kind of woman
New York A strange thing happened to me here in the Bagel last week. Having read the recent review…
The truth behind those Airbnb snaps
Catriona and I had agreed that a terrace for smoking, eating, drinking and painting was a necessity rather than a…
In the middle of our holiday came the phone call I was dreading
Just before Tara left us, the old chestnut mare used to enjoy standing at the bottom gate watching the sun…
Why Roy Cohn is not one of the world’s most evil men
New York The Roy Cohn documentary Bully. Coward. Victim: the Story of Roy Cohn was successfully screened at the…
What had the chambermaid made of my penis vacuum pump?
Fumbling outside my door in dripping swimming trunks for my room key, I was hailed cheerily by the maid from…
My bid to boost my carbon footprint
Inspired by Harry and Meghan I decided to get on a plane. I hadn’t been anywhere for so long it…
What you can tell about a man from his choice of underwear
New York It’s Indian summertime and the living is easy. There hasn’t been a cloud above the Bagel for two…
Will mindfulness turn me into a Remainer?
Mindfulness at our all-inclusive Turkish beach resort began at 11 o’clock. Our mindfulness teacher was a tiny, smiley, flexible-looking woman…
Should I return to the land of my Italian ancestors?
When I was growing up, my Italian grandfather was my favourite person. He taught me to play a mean game…
An elegy for New York
New York The master of the love letter to New York, E.B. White, eloquently described the city as a place…
Why Sodom and south Devon are a million miles apart
We gathered around in the sunshine and watched the coffin being lowered into the freshly dug trench. Stratifications visible on…
The rise of the Brexitainers
The Union Jack is flying on the front of my house. After a long discussion with the local council, planning…
![[Photo: by-studio]](https://spectatorau.imgix.net/content/uploads/2019/09/21SeptHighlife.jpg?auto=compress,enhance,format&crop=faces,entropy,edges&fit=crop&w=410&h=275)
Why I prefer cows to humans
Gstaad The cows are coming down, the cows are coming down, and I’m off to the Bagel. My Swiss…
![[Photo: Lovattpics]](https://spectatorau.imgix.net/content/uploads/2019/09/21Septlowlife.jpg?auto=compress,enhance,format&crop=faces,entropy,edges&fit=crop&w=410&h=275)
Semi-recluse (me) seeks dilapidated cottage on Dartmoor to rent
So now I must find somewhere else to put my books and live sometimes. Dartmoor, I thought: one of the…
![Do I need planning permission to fly a Union Flag on my house? [Photo: coldsnowstorm]](https://spectatorau.imgix.net/content/uploads/2019/09/21Septreallife.jpg?auto=compress,enhance,format&crop=faces,entropy,edges&fit=crop&w=410&h=275)
What Brexiteers can teach Remoaners about good manners
‘If we are going to Westminster to riot,’ I told my Brexit-voting friends over dinner at the Thai restaurant at…
Remembering Tim Hoare – a man like no other
He was a Falstaff in his drinking and in his celebration of life, but his greatness lay in his friendships.…
The woman laid out in the coffin in front of us wasn’t Mum
The receptionist with brown lipstick showed my son and me into a faultless waiting room, whose centrepiece was a big…
Pet health insurance is a scam
‘The reason vets are so expensive now,’ explained the vet in her snazzy green uniform, ‘is because we can do…
When it comes to Brexit, everything that can be tried will always fail
It is all beginning to feel like the closing scenes of the 1980 spoof comedy film Airplane! In particular the…
My soulmate Brian Sewell
Romy Somerset is the sweetest, nicest young girl in London. She’s also my goddaughter and I remember, during her christening…
The mysterious ways of the French
These new tablets that will save or at least prolong my life have unpredictable side effects which only now, a…
How it feels to be the only Brexiteers in the village
We are the only Brexiteers in the village. That, at least, is how it feels. Out they come, the far…
How to be a man
Gstaad I was reading in these here pages Julie Burchill’s review of Candace Bushnell’s Is There Still Sex in…
Catriona’s accident has made of us minor celebrities in the village
Three weeks ago Catriona was going to the village shop when a building site security fence fell on her. Wire…
The EU has banned a miracle cure for laminitis
Once upon a time, in a country that didn’t run itself, a horse supplement company invented a cure for laminitis.…
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