Imagine for a moment that you could separate the idiotic residents within a country… Put the idiots on one side and the good people on the other to get on with life, laughter, and the former values that they once knew and grew up with.

It is abundantly clear that we urgently need to eliminate the incessant peddling of fear, anxiety, and the resultant collapse of living standards being created by people impersonating leaders.

We urgently need to regain contentment, family values, and nostalgia for the way we were before the socialists lied their way through the front door into our living rooms.

What a splendid idea!

Let’s start with a basic approach that even the simplest of souls can understand – a little colouring-in exercise. Colour the map of Australia with the highest unhappy protest-march population – NSW and Victoria – a nappy-poo brown. Then colour the highest Woke population – the ACT – a diarrhea light brown. Then colour the highest population of environmental rules – SA, Tasmania and, oops, the ACT again – with a vomitty green. Then colour the highest population of bureaucrats – the ACT (again!) and Victoria (again!) – a murky orange. Now colour the highest debt per head of population – Victoria (again), Tasmania (again), and of course the centre of overspending ACT (again) – a pukey yellow.

Gazing at this simple map, it seems to me that Queensland, the Northern Territory, and Western Australia are the only parts of our nation worth saving. Yes! The North and the West! Let’s call it New Australia. A vibrant new nation, with a clean sheet approach to its economy, copying the most successful nations on the planet.

No free rides here, an honest education, tough laws and realistic judiciary, and national service with skills training and no exceptions. Most importantly, strict immigration standards, ensuring assimilation of all newcomers (like it used to be).

Seems simple, really. Why have we paid so many fools to mess it up?

Meanwhile, what to name the rest of the country? Greensland springs to mind – and what do with it?

I think the Donald would love a place to dump all of his millions of illegal immigrants, overcrowded jails, and former democrat politicians. We need a marketing strategy, but considering New Australia has the US Military commitments, better weather, and better mineral wealth, this should be an easy Deal.

The Deal needs to play into Albanese’s hand. Instead of addressing what is best for Australians, Albo prefers to myopically focus on his own re-election.

Donald’s refugee relocation plan would blend really well into Albo’s Greensland.

As the Labor government doesn’t have the commercial skills to run a car boot sale, doesn’t understand basic economics, and thinks that the GST is their Climate Change and Energy Minister (the Great Stupid Twit), the Deal has to be dressed and presented in a win-win scenario. Both wins for Albo!

We could cut to the chase on the valuation of Greensland!

Those four States and a Territory, net debt, would have to be worth at least $38! Forget about a written valuation, just let Albo have it for $38 cash. What a deal!

Then our New Australia, with renewed US tariff agreements, agreement to lift our defence spend to 5 per cent of GDP, will immediately contract the US to build a big wall to keep the Greenslanders out.

In this way, the Greenslanders can thoroughly enjoy their pristine, unique, and preserved way of socialist living. In the famous words of Klaus Schwab, ‘You will own nothing, and you will be happy!’

This new and rewarding life for Greenslanders, will keep them busily developing all their new derivatives of vaccines, genders, lily-livered weak laws, new public holidays with less working hours, new names for old places, and new versions of invasion history. This exciting list is endless. As most of the locals will already be working from home, they won’t actually notice these changes happening.

In New Australia, we will immediately scrap Net Zero, UN membership, payroll tax, and other disincentives to small businesses. Let’s get on with it!

Simultaneously, we will repeal 75 per cent of the EPA/EPBC regulations, build a series of ports around the north coastline without any permission, using the tried and proven Chinese Spratleys Technique (CST), where forgiveness is much easier than permission.

We will re-introduce the 40-hour week, two weeks annual holidays, and only 10 public holidays per annum.

So… What’s in it for Donald now that Albo will be Greensland Emperor for the rest of his life?

After careful consideration by mind-reading the three former leaders of New Australia, we are going to bequeath ‘Groote Island’ to the US as a new State and revert back to the English version being ‘Great Island’ in honour of the hero of the West, Donald the Great. This is a much better achievement than a Nobel Peace Prize.
We will also bequeath Thursday Island and the Tiwi Islands to the US, as we need their sovereignty and their military might to protect our sorry asses, no thanks to Emperor Albo who ignored our natural assets, then squandered the family jewels.

As to the climate change Net Zero mantra, this UN ritual can be incorporated into Albo’s national anthem, the Greensland flag, and their opening Welcome to Country ceremonies.

Okay, once again, let’s get on with it!