Flat White

Impeachment? As Bill Clinton once said, Mr President, I feel your pain

19 January 2020

5:00 AM

19 January 2020

5:00 AM

It’s excruciating. My eye rolls are so severe and unstoppable that my eyelids are sore. My forehead is red from my slapping. My right thigh is bruised from my slamming with outrage. My ribs hurt from derisory laughter. All this self-harm is the fault of America’s Democrats, their leftie lunatic sympathisers and their loser media lackeys, as they let their impotent fury at losing to Donald Trump drive their suicidal impeachment mission. 

Did you see any of it? Finally, on our Friday, January 17, they delivered the Articles of Impeachment of Donald Trump that the Democrat-controlled House passed a month earlier, their leadership wrapping its unconstitutional, illegitimate impeachment in the robes of ceremony, announcing it in the flowery language of self-importance and the manufactured gravitas that tried to hide the pathetic creature beneath; a skinny, starved, stinking pig with bright red lipstick.  


It was a “solemn” moment, insisted Speaker Nancy Pelosi several times after handing out her self-branded souvenir pens during the signing process as if repeating it convinced us. It was defending the Constitution from a dastardly, “outlaw President (according to one fool on CNN) who threatened America’s security for selfish political gain by pressuring the newly elected anti-corruption Ukrainian Government to investigate the Ukrainian gas company, Burisma, whose board had been stacked (at exorbitant director’s fees) with Hunter Biden, son of ex VP Joe – when Joe was policy chief on Ukraine in the Obama administration.  

The multi-million dollar military aid destined for Ukraine (for self-defence against Russia, aid which Obama denied them) was temporarily delayed last year but soon paid, even though no such investigation took place.  

The Democrats framed this as gross of abuse of power (Article 1); and that Trump refusing to co-operate with their lynching without court orders was described as obstruction of Congress (Article 2). No crime, high or low, was cited, though… The procession of humbugging Democrat Senators marching into the upper chamber to make their oaths of “doing impartial justice” in the Senate trial was the last straw in this farce, their leaders having insisted on a “fair trial” and absence of political bias from the Republican senators … what, like their Trump-hating Presidential candidates sitting in the Senate?  

No wonder my eyes keep rolling … must stop slapping forehead. The impeachment trial proper (!?!) starts on Tuesday next week Washington time. 

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