Mind your language
The linguistic ingredients of ‘salmagundi’
‘It makes me hungry,’ said my husband when I mentioned the word salmagundi. That is his reaction to many words.…
The Aesopian language of algospeak
To evade algorithms that hunt down forbidden words, users of platforms like TikTok employ cryptic synonyms. So deadbecomes unalive, and…
What’s the right way to pronounce ‘gif’?
The man who invented gifs, Stephen Wilhite, has died, aged 74. Controversy survives him – over how to pronounce the…
When did brothers and sisters become ‘siblings’?
I never cared much for the word sibling, though I hardly knew why. The reason must be that it was…
How do you pronounce ‘Cirencester’ and ‘Marylebone’?
‘Half! Half! Half!’ exclaimed my husband like a performing sea lion. Not that sea lions perform any more, but you…
The ancient origins of ‘doomscrolling’
In 2019, Boris Johnson hit out at ‘the doomsters and the gloomsters’. I was surprised then to find that the…
Why does everything ‘embolden’ Putin?
The most emboldened man on earth must be Vladimir Putin. Everything seems to embolden him. Treating Russia as a pariah…
The complicated business of swearing in Ukrainian
‘This will interest you,’ said my husband, looking up from the smeared screen of his telephone. For once he was…
How 'like' lost its way
A strange crisis has befallen like. It had long been an object of obloquy and vilification in two functions. The…
Where’s the ‘mystery’ in mystery plays?
In The Archers, Ambridge put on its own set of mystery plays dramatising the Nativity and Passion. BBC Radio 4…
When did ‘pikey’ become offensive?
A policeman sent a colleague who was house-sitting for him a WhatsApp message: ‘Keep the pikeys out.’ He was sacked…
What does ice cream have to do with ‘late capitalism’?
‘More to my taste is Trockenbeerenkapitalismus,’ said my husband with an intonation that indicated a joke. The joke was a…
What’s so funny about ‘helpmeet’?
‘What’s so funny?’ asked my husband, accusingly, as I made an amused noise while relaxing with a copy of the…
Is the Duke of York’s title really ‘untenable’?
‘Nurse! The tenaculum!’ exclaimed my husband in the manner of James Robertson Justice playing the surgeon Sir Lancelot Spratt. I’m…
The elementary misuse of ‘alumni’
My husband is forever being sent magazines from his Oxford college inviting him to give it money. I suggest he…
Backlash
‘Lashings of ginger beer?’ asked my husband when I mentioned backlash. He thought the phrase came from Enid Blyton, though…
What do Millwall supporters and internet alt-righters have in common?
My grown-up friends don’t use based in its new slangy sense, so I asked Veronica (whom I still think of…
The six ways to pronounce ‘Omicron’
‘There once was a curate of Kew, / Who kept a young cat in a pew,’ began my husband when…
Should we ramp down ramping down?
Language change outdoes nonsense, just as misbehaviour outdoes satire. In Through the Looking-Glass Alice mentions to the Gnat that, where…
How are you meant to pronounce Uranus?
I had thought there were two pronunciations of Uranus. My husband, still capable of distinguishing the anatomical from the planetary,…
Has Boris Johnson really ‘trashed’ parliament’s reputation?
‘When they posted the closing-night notice for his first Broadway play, Comes a Day, he went into a drunken rage,…
The real ‘scallop’ war: how do you pronounce it?
‘You say scallops and I say scallops,’ sang my husband in his best Ginger Rogers accents. Since we both pronounce…
Can men be witches?
‘No, darling, I certainly wouldn’t call you a witch,’ said my husband. ‘You’re not thin enough.’ The Oxford English Dictionary…
Can a criminal really be ‘prolific’?
The BBC made a documentary about a man sent to prison for being the ‘most prolific rapist in British legal…
