Dear Mary
How should you deal with a competitive best friend?
Q. Good friends, who moved away from our city suburb a couple of years ago, retain a pied-à-terre the better…
Dear Mary: Help! My husband won’t wash his hands after going to the loo
Q. My husband doesn’t wash his hands after spending a penny and he doesn’t wash his hands after ‘spending tuppence’,…
Dear Mary: How can we make an ungrateful relative acknowledge a £500 cheque?
Q. My wife’s much younger sister is lazy and impossible. She forgets birthdays, is invariably late, lets people down and…
Dear Mary: My friend always has food around his mouth. How can I help him?
Q. A dear friend of my husband, a shy bachelor, is an acquired taste. Once you acquire it you are…
Dear Mary: How do you deal with a monologuing fellow guest on board a yacht?
Q. A long-standing friend has an admirer of some means. He has invited her to borrow his fully staffed and…
Dear Mary: How does a Wimbledon ball girl deal with a disgusting player?
Q. I’ve accepted an invitation to stay in a small house party in France. My host hasn’t mentioned who else…
Dear Mary: How can I stop a controversial columnist from being sacked?
Q. A close friend is an elderly writer who has contributed, as a monthly columnist, to the same publication for…
Dear Mary: I’m a freelancer – how do I get people to return my calls?
Q. Being professionals in trade, we find ourselves increasingly being asked by friends, who could well afford to use our…
Dear Mary: What is the correct form when you find someone hiding from you in a cupboard?
Q. Is there a tactful way to ask people with whom you’ve been interacting on an almost daily basis over…
Dear Mary: Is it vulgar to give money as a wedding gift?
Q. I work at a desk by a window which looks out on to the street where I live. I…
Dear Mary: As best man, can I seduce the groom’s sister?
Q. We often take friends to what my husband calls a ‘poncey’ pub which has won numerous awards and where…
Dear Mary: How can I explain the cushion I must take everywhere to sit on?
Q. I have incurable, inoperable back pain that severely hinders my ability to sit and necessitates my taking a cushion…
Dear Mary: How can I pin down flakey party-goers?
Q. My 50th birthday is looming and I am hosting a small dinner in a restaurant. This has proved challenging…
Dear Mary: A work colleague has a brain tumour — and his self pity is annoying me
Q. When buying a present for a friend, I would not dream of glugging from the bottle or helping myself…
Dear Mary: My new boyfriend is too short. Can I make him wear shoe lifts?
Q. An acquaintance, whom I admire but don’t know well, sent me a ‘begging’ letter to donate to a charity…
Dear Mary: At a smart dinner party, is it wrong to ask for the wifi code?
Q. My husband and I are excited to have been invited to dinner by our most important neighbour. However our…
Dear Mary: our son’s future in-laws want to play social oneupmanship with us
Q. We were about to send off to the printers the invitation for our son’s wedding (we agreed to do…
Dear Mary: How do we deal with our host’s sudden, terrifying rages?
Q. Along with five of my favourite people, I’ve been invited again to what should be an idyllic house party…
Dear Mary: How to get out of a neighbours’ dinner party invite?
Q. A couple who live directly opposite us in London have sent a save-the-date notice for a big party they…
Dear Mary: How can I tell a friend her mole is disgusting?
Q. Recently, during a stay in a luxurious mountain hotel in Italy, and having hurt my knee skiing, I was…
How can I avoid power handshakes? They hurt my fragile knuckles
Q. How does one avoid power handshakes? Twenty-five years of wicket-keeping have left me with pathetically fragile knuckles, and each…
Dear Mary: My daughter’s new boyfriend isn’t on Facebook – how do I snoop?
Q. Recently I held a party at which some people were meeting each other for the first time. One social-climbing…
Dear Mary: How do I tell my landlords they’ve ruined my life?
Q. For some time I have been spoiled by paying a small rent for a central flat belonging to absentee…
Dear Mary: how can we dissuade friends from visiting when one of us is ill?
Q. Obviously one is delighted to have visits from close friends and family when one’s spouse is ailing, but how…
Dear Mary: How can we get our star friend along to dinner when he’s so busy?
Q. We want to invite a rather exceptional friend to dinner. He lives nearby but he has a top job…
