Competition

Spectator competition winners: Toe-curling analogies

12 November 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3274, you were invited to supply toe-curling analogies. Bad writing has attracted some high-brow fans. J.R.R. Tolkien…

Spectator competition winners: Samuel Pepys on Liz Truss

29 October 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3272, you were invited to imagine a well-known diarist, real or fictitious, commenting on contemporary events. This…

Spectator competition winners: poems about the Oxford comma

22 October 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3271, you were invited to submit a poem about the Oxford comma. Thérèse Coffey’s much-maligned edict about…

Spectator competition winners: short stories entitled ‘The Queue’

15 October 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3270, you were invited to submit a short story entitled ‘The Queue’. As well as inspiring this…

Spectator competition winners: poems about Her late Majesty’s favourite things

8 October 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3269, you were invited to write a poem about Her late Majesty’s favourite things. Alongside the more…

Spectator competition winners: children’s stories get the horror treatment

1 October 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3268, you were invited to recast an extract from children’s literature in the horror genre. In the…

Spectator competition winners: songs from the corporate songbooks of Google and Amazon

24 September 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3267, you were invited to supply a song from the songbook of one of today’s corporate giants.…

Spectator competition winners: Philip Larkin’s poems rewritten by other poets

17 September 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3266, you were invited to reimagine one of Philip Larkin’s poems in the style of a poet…

Spectator competition winners: Ebenezer Scrooge asks for a loan

10 September 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3265, you were invited to submit a letter to a friend asking for a loan as it…

Spectator competition winners: surreptitious sonnets

3 September 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3264, you were invited to submit a poem in response to the following journal entry by Wallace…

Spectator competition winners: cosy crime with a topical twist

27 August 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3263, you were invited to submit a short story, written in the style of a cosy mystery…

Spectator competition winners: Tory leadership acrostics

20 August 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3262, you were invited to submit a poem on behalf of Rishi Sunak or Liz Truss in…

Poems about the James Webb Space Telescope

13 August 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3261, you were invited to submit a poem about the James Webb Space Telescope. The first dazzling…

Spectator competition winners: Government ministries you didn’t know existed

6 August 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3260, a challenge suggested by a reader, you were invited to reveal the existence of a hitherto…

Spectator competition winners: A Kentish Lad

30 July 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3259, you were invited to submit a poem entitled ‘A(n) [insert county of your choice] Lad’. There…

Spectator competition winners: a postcard from Airstrip One

23 July 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3258, you were invited to submit a postcard sent while on holiday in a well-known fictional destination…

Spectator competition winners: filmericks

16 July 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3257, you were invited to summarise a film in limerick form. A nod to Ezra Haber Glenn,…

Spectator competition winners: famous poems rewritten as short stories

9 July 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3256, you were invited to take a well-known poem and recast it as a short story. Ben…

Spectator competition winners: poems about imperial measures

2 July 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3255, you were invited to submit a poem about imperial measures. Brian Bilston’s terrific poem ‘The Empire’s…

‘Poundland and Prejudice’: book titles tweaked for straitened times

25 June 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3254, you were invited to tweak a well-known book title to reflect the straitened times we live…

Spectator competition winners: What was Edgar Allen Poe created for?

18 June 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3253, you were invited to write a poem entitled ‘Song of Myself’ in the style of the…

Spectator competition winners: how not to write a letter of condolence

11 June 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3252, you were invited to write a letter of condolence on the mis-fortune of an acquaintance which,…

Spectator competition winners: Platinum Jubilee poems from Kipling and A.A. Milne

4 June 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3251, you were invited to submit a poem to mark the Queen’s platinum jubilee in the style…

Spectator competition winners: sonnets on Mammon

28 May 2022 9:00 am

In Competition No. 3250, you were invited to submit a sonnet to Mammon. It was ‘Epigram for Wall Street’, attributed…