Matt Percival

‘How do you afford it on your salary?’

Matt Percival 6 June 2026 9:00 am

‘He thinks filtered is best.’

Matt Percival 30 May 2026 9:00 am

‘We apologise for the delay – we are still trying to establish a timetable for departures.’

Matt Percival 16 May 2026 9:00 am

‘She’s extended the ceasefire but the blockade continues.’

Matt Percival 2 May 2026 9:00 am

‘You failed the vetting process,’

Matt Percival 25 April 2026 9:00 am

‘We are no longer in dynamic alignment.’

Matt Percival 18 April 2026 9:00 am

‘He strays a lot further than we thought.’

Matt Percival 11 April 2026 9:00 am

‘Vet fees.’

Matt Percival 28 March 2026 9:00 am

And on that bombshell we’ll find out what happens to the oil price tomorrow

Matt Percival 14 March 2026 9:00 am

‘Your forecast is already out of date.’

Matt Percival 7 March 2026 9:00 am

‘You’ll have to wait until I’ve gone through your emails.’

Matt Percival 28 February 2026 9:00 am

‘They want you to release all your messages.’

Matt Percival 14 February 2026 9:00 am

‘At least the ground rent will be capped at £250.’

Matt Percival 31 January 2026 9:00 am

It’s enlightening but not in a good way

Matt Percival 24 January 2026 9:00 am

‘And on that cliffhanger, we’ll have to wait until tomorrow to find out what happens next.’

Matt Percival 24 January 2026 9:00 am

I prefer something based on a true story

Matt Percival 17 January 2026 9:00 am

We didn’t want dogs

Matt Percival 10 January 2026 9:00 am

‘You look nothing like your profile photo.’

Matt Percival 13 December 2025 9:00 am

Not for EU

Matt Percival 13 December 2025 9:00 am

‘I’m spending Christmas alone this year.’

Matt Percival 6 December 2025 9:00 am

‘Would you like to make a salary sacrifice?’

Matt Percival 29 November 2025 9:00 am

I want to confirm delivery

Matt Percival 22 November 2025 9:00 am

‘I thought I’d begin by setting out my economic challenges.’

Matt Percival 15 November 2025 9:00 am

The light is more flattering

Matt Percival 25 October 2025 9:00 am

If it wasn’t for Ozempic, I’d still be a fat cat.

Matt Percival 4 October 2025 9:00 am

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