Children
It’s dangerous and wrong to tell all children they’re ‘gender fluid’
Once upon a time, ‘binary’ was a mathematical term. Now it is an insult on a par with ‘racist’, ‘sexist’…
Damon Albarn’s wonder.land will not succeed at the National. It might work in Vegas
Damon Albarn and Rufus Norris present a musical version of Alice in Wonderland. A challenging enterprise even if they’d stuck…
Tis the season for disagreeing with your spouse about everything
The older I get, the more Scrooge-like I become. I’m dyspeptic, misanthropic, curmudgeonly, parsimonious and unsentimental. Caroline, by contrast, is…
Tips from Just William on making a Christmas list
William Brown had the right idea about Christmas lists. Under the heading ‘Things I Want for Christmas’, he requests: a…
Dear Mary: How to stop someone from giving my tiny children expensive clothes that they never wear?
Q. Is there a tactful way to deter certain people from buying clothing for one’s tiny children as Christmas presents?…
How do you explain events that even adults can’t understand to a child?
Seeing my ten-year-old daughter, Freya, a week after the massacre in Paris, I asked her if she had heard anything…
Meet Leo, the youngest member of our household
I’m pleased to announce an addition to the Young household — a ten-week-old Vizsla. For those unfamiliar with this particular breed…
Why most four-year-olds deserve to be sectioned
The first episode of Let Us Entertain You (BBC2, Wednesday) definitely couldn’t be accused of lacking a central thesis. Presenter…
My obsession with litter is bordering on mental illness
It’s no good. I’ve tried to resist it, but I’ve succumbed. I’m now a full-blown litter Nazi. Whenever I leave…
At age two, my August-born son is already being marked out for failure
In six months’ time, my son is due to attend an assessment day for a nursery. The details on the…
A six-year-old sharpshooter and a New Zealand white – both bound to improve with age
The Honourable Society of Odd Bottles began proceedings with a report on the activities of our junior branch. These youngsters…
The new adventures of the adventure playground
Mud, timber, junk, fires, splinters, rust, daubed paint… Suddenly people are talking about adventure playgrounds again. With the Turner Prize-nominated…
Dear Mary: unacceptable behaviour at a book signing
Q. At a recent literary festival I attended a talk with a high-profile octogenarian writer. I had already bought her…
Dear Mary: My husband has shaved his head for a newspaper feature
Q. My partner, a leading political commentator on a national newspaper, recently agreed to shave off his hair at the…
Fatherhood is killing me
Not a day passes when I don’t look on my father’s record with shock and awe. I’m not talking about…
How we drive our children mad
Mental health is a slippery concept at best and according to the annual prevalence rates given in the latest Diagnostic…
I have the right to raise my monsters as I wish
I was on the phone to Girl, thinking of something interesting to tell her. ‘Oh yeah,’ I said. ‘And this…
The benefits of breeding like a rabbit
Let’s face it. Whatever Pope Francis actually means when his head is in the clouds during those in-flight press conferences…
Life is full of little endings. We should pay them more attention
The end of the year seems a good time to think about lasts. Not many of us ever do. Firsts…
Peter Phillips is mugged by a gang of Praetorius-loving six-year-old girls in China
We have read about the remarkable opening up of China in recent years: how many people live there and how…
Rextail: a restaurant for billionaire children
Rextail is a restaurant for billionaire children, such as Richie Rich. Its owner, Arcady Novikov, has already opened a restaurant…
Dear Mary: Is it rude to answer my child's call when I'm already on the phone?
Q. My problem is that an older friend, with whom I enjoy lengthy telephone chats, becomes furious when my call…
I know that Richard Dawkins is wrong about Down’s syndrome, because I know my son
No household that contains a 13-year-old boy is eternally tranquil. There had been a bit of temperament that evening, an…
A.N. Wilson's diary: The book that made me a writer – and the pushchair that made me an old git
Like many inward-looking children, I always doodled stories and poems. Knowing one wanted to be a writer is a different…
Want to be a neglectful parent? Come to a festival and learn
I spent last weekend at Port Eliot in Cornwall. This is supposed to be a literary and music festival and…
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