Cartoon

Murder

16 May 2015 9:00 am

‘What our company needs, Jenson, is more women — they’re so much cheaper.’

Cheaper

16 May 2015 9:00 am

‘To go?’

Mcdonalds

16 May 2015 9:00 am

‘He’s a shy pollster.’

Blanket

16 May 2015 9:00 am

Downing street

16 May 2015 9:00 am

Cricket ground

16 May 2015 9:00 am

Sea side

16 May 2015 9:00 am

‘I can’t decide — these pencils are all as stubby as each other.’

Stubby

9 May 2015 9:00 am

‘Oh God, it’s that luvvie again.’

Mickey

9 May 2015 9:00 am

‘Some politician, dog bit him while canvassing… make sure he waits at least five hours.’

A&E

9 May 2015 9:00 am

Caveman

9 May 2015 9:00 am

‘Tooth fairy?! I want a visit from the lip-filler fairy!’

Tooth

9 May 2015 9:00 am

Lifesty

9 May 2015 9:00 am

Bank

9 May 2015 9:00 am

Ipad

9 May 2015 9:00 am

‘I don’t mind a bit of role-play, but I absolutely refuse to dress up as Nicola Sturgeon.’

Mind

9 May 2015 9:00 am

‘I guess you know why I’m here?’

Election

9 May 2015 9:00 am

‘Of course, it doesn’t make any sense since the election pledges wore off.’

Monolith

9 May 2015 9:00 am

‘Get the nuclear codes in case Nicola Sturgeon tries to wipe us out.’

Trident

9 May 2015 9:00 am

‘I’ll write an Iraq report before Sir John Chilcot.’

Monkey

2 May 2015 9:00 am

Election

2 May 2015 9:00 am

‘You’re right, I do feel subeditors are outdated. How did you know?’

Sub

2 May 2015 9:00 am

‘Your trouble is you’re too selfie-centred.’

Selfie

2 May 2015 9:00 am

‘Couldn’t you just have said, “Sorry, mate, was that your pint? Here, let me get you another one.”?’

Sorry

2 May 2015 9:00 am

‘My son? Oh, I’m afraid he’s no longer with us.’

Son

2 May 2015 9:00 am