Dear Mary: How do I find out if my handsome bathroom salesman is single?
Q. A decade ago I commissioned a handmade velvet opera coat from a fabulous local designer. She was then struggling…
Dear Mary: Help! My neighbour knows I lied about her daughter’s wedding photos
Q. I have been booked to give my first talk on my field of professional interest. I happen to have…
Dear Mary: Do I have to read the romantic novel my neighbour has based on me?
Q. A woman in our village has written a romantic novel in which one of the leading characters is said…
Dear Mary: How can I find out who else is coming to a house party?
Q. I have accepted an invitation to a five-day house party in Scotland. I know it is a breach of…
Dear Mary: How do I get a Lycra-wearing cyclist to dress for drinks?
Q. A good friend often cycles over when I invite him for drinks. The trouble is he insists on turning…
Dear Mary: How do we avoid having dinner with our new cruise friends every night?
Q. My twins’ birthday is coming up, but we will be in the country. Their godparents are usually punctilious, but…
Dear Mary: how can I set my daughter up with a nice young man?
Q. I am soon to entertain a house party on a sporting estate. We took the same house last year…
Dear Mary: Was I wrong to strip my guest’s bed before she left?
Q. My friend has had an irritating experience in our local cinema. She speaks fluent French and teaches it in…
Dear Mary: How do I calculate how much caviar to take?
Q. While on holiday in Corfu, we met a rather nice man who invited us to his house for dinner.…
Dear Mary: Help! My neighbour keeps getting me drunk
Q. We have a neighbour who always overfills my glass. I beg her not to. Even if I commit the…
Dear Mary: How can I get through a long, exhausting wedding?
Q. When I have an arrangement to meet a certain friend for lunch she sometimes turns up with a streaming…
Dear Mary: How do we handle staying with friends with very different political views?
Q. We are going to stay with some old friends who we haven’t seen for a couple of years as…
Dear Mary: How can I get enough champagne at a party?
Q. I had the same Spanish housekeeper for 25 years and was devoted to her, and she to me. She…
Dear Mary: Where should I seat Hollywood stars at dinner?
Q. My husband and I have recently made very good friends with some neighbours in France. They know I am…
Dear Mary: How do I ditch my slow-walking friend?
Q. I recently attended an opera on a friend’s estate in Kent. It was a multi-generational, non-ticketed, invitation-only event. The…
Dear Mary: How do I stop my friends going on about their ‘neurodivergence’?
Q. Everyone I know pretends to have neurodivergence to make themselves seem more unusual and so they can talk about…
Dear Mary: how can I point out a friend’s unsightly nose hair?
Q. I’m the author of 14 books, mostly historical fiction but a few children’s books, all published by a major…
Dear Mary: How do you leave a party early?
Q. How can you leave a party early – e.g. at midnight rather than 4 a.m. – without everyone thinking…
Dear Mary: How do you decipher modern RSVPs?
Q. I was caught off guard last week by a busybody mother at my son’s boarding school asking us to…
Dear Mary: how can I relax about the clothes moths in my home?
Q. Having previously lived in the country in a field with my nearest neighbour not even visible, I recently moved…
Dear Mary: What is the etiquette of responding to save-the-dates?
Q. I have a problem with a much older friend who is slightly insecure and super-sensitive to criticism and I…
Dear Mary: how can I tell young people to pipe down at dinner parties?
Q. I find that when I go to mixed-age dinner parties the young all seem to be shouting. How can…
Dear Mary: Must I take my mother-in-law’s hideous cast-offs?
Q. My soon-to-be mother-in-law has started off-loading large amounts of her expensive but hideous cast-off clothes on to me. I…
Dear Mary: Is it acceptable to go to bed before my guests do?
Q. I am a self-employed travel specialist, concentrating on holidays in Asia. Friends (and even friends of friends) plague me…
Dear Mary: Should weddings be ‘no ring no bring’?
Q. An old friend who is extremely generous and loyal has the most infuriating habit. Despite being efficient in other…
