This week, the European Union, in its infinite wisdom, made pretty much the only blunder which, in the eyes of Falkland Islanders, there is no coming back from: referring to the Falklands as ‘Las Malvinas’.

The row was sparked after the EU chose to sign a declaration with Argentina and 32 other South American countries, referring to the UK overseas territory as both ‘Islas Malvinas’ and the ‘Falkland Islands’.

Brussels might not – perhaps – quite realise the extent to which the M-word is no laughing matter in these latitudes. (Just ask a Spanish teaching friend of mine!) But Argentina’s government instantly hailed the usage as a ‘diplomatic triumph’ and their foreign minister declared openly they want to use this ‘to further expand dialogue with the EU regarding the question of the Malvinas Islands.’

To say that Islanders are not too taken with this idea would be an understatement. Rishi Sunak correctly calling it ‘entirely unacceptable’ that the EU should appear to question the population’s enshrined right to self-determination.

The EU’s diplomatic service hastily sent out a spokesman to deny that their stance with regard to the South Atlantic micro-nation had changed. In fact, they seemed to object, Argentina had somewhat ‘spun’ the solitary reference to ‘Las Malvinas’. Well, obviously.

To say that Islanders are not too taken with this idea would be an understatement

But the document was signed by the presidents of both the European Council and the European Commission. And, what’s more, this is apparently the first time they’ve seen fit to use ‘Malvinas’ (before, that is, their spokesman said it twice more in his non-apology). So the British government is now rightly concerned that European states might see this as a green light on the (so-called) issue of the Islands’ sovereignty.

Innocent mistakes do, naturally, occur. A few years back, I’m told, one social media site would slap an M-word filter over pictures taken in the Falklands. Last month, my editor had to inform the Student Loans Company – managed by HMG’s own Department for Education – that her current abode was not in ‘the Malvinas’. Another colleague once found this most improper of nouns on the website of, if you can credit it, the Royal Marines Benevolent Fund.

The EU isn’t Snapchat, though. These are professional diplomats, and they’d been lobbied hard by Argentina to cede ground patently off-limits while the Falklands were still the attached limb of an existing EU member.

The deputy chair of the Falklands’ Legislative Assembly, Teslyn Barkman, issued a forgivably dismissive statement in which she expressed disappointment ‘that it has been decided, without input from the Falkland Islands or the UK government, to refer to our Islands by a name that has been given to us by our aggressive and hostile neighbour’. The Falklands’ governor, Alison Blake, has charged the Argentinians with wilfully misrepresenting the EU’s position on the entire business.

Oddly enough, it happens to be election season now in Argentina. But honestly, this sort of posturing would be no great shock anyway: in Buenos Aires the M-word gets deployed on any day that has a Y in it.

On this side of the water, though, the truth is there is absolutely nobody who thinks that Argentina ought to govern and/or own the Falklands. This was put to a referendum in 2013, with an outcome so thumping I do sometimes find myself saying to interested people overseas, ‘Yeah, look, this isn’t Belarus, alright…?’ (the renegade 0.2 per cent, for better or worse, were almost certainly after full-on independence).

Despite this, year in, year out, thanks to Argentina, Falklands delegates dutifully present themselves at international bodies like the UN, to listen to copy-and-paste nonsense about ‘decolonisation’ and ‘settling disputes through peaceful dialogue’. This dispute, of course, has already been definitively settled. It wasn’t peaceful; but then whose fault was that?

There are long-term serious problems caused by the incessant aggro from the Falklands’ nearest, largest neighbour. But on this occasion, the Islands’ community board – an arena that could, most days, be charitably classified as ‘feisty’ – could almost not even bestir itself to react.

Since the FIG statement went up, in fact, posts have included complaints over a dysfunctional car wash, the major hotel restaurant being closed this Saturday, a lecture on peat, the availability of pizza at curry night, someone wanting a ball ticket, a pranged fender outside the bank, ongoing strife with Airbridge transport to and from Brize Norton (or not), and the announcement of a reception for the returning Island Games competitors and those who took part at the recent Golden Shears in Edinburgh.

Or, as MLA Barkman put it: ‘the news from Brussels changes nothing.’