A new Arts policy has been released to help raise the creative standard just as a balding redhead called Ed Sheeran lowers it by performing to record crowds at the MCG. Both of them can’t be right.

As counterpoint to the Sheeran ordinariness and doubling down on the cultural disconnect, a flamboyant Harry Styles in gender-bending yellow flares and elevator boots is finding his inner Daniel Ricciardo by doing shoeys at his concerts to Gen Z chants of ‘shoey, shoey, shoey’ which sounds an awful lot like the ‘Aussie, Aussie Aussie, oi, oi, oi’ of previous generations the Z-ers now seem...