Dear Mary
Dear Mary: Why aren’t I getting more Instagram ‘likes’?
Q. As a novice user of Instagram I was flattered at how quickly I gathered followers – 200 already. Many…
Dear Mary: How do I get out of a friend’s bad birthday party?
Q. I shall be spending more time in the company of newer acquaintances in the West Country and would appreciate…
Dear Mary: is it OK for guests to steal pears at Glyndebourne?
Q. We have been invited to a small but formal dinner in the presence of someone who has been a…
Dear Mary: How do I confront my husband without telling him I hacked his emails?
Q. The Queen had the knack of making you feel that you were the only person in the room. At…
Dear Mary: How do I get my friends to leave after a dinner party?
Q. We have made available our mews cottage – 30 yards from our main house – to a woman with…
Dear Mary: Was I wrong to tell my friend’s boyfriend he was snoring?
Q. I have had an email inviting me to an old girls’ reunion, class of 1976. The organiser suggested we…
Dear Mary: How can I find out whether old friends fancy each other?
Q. How can I find out, without making things awkward, whether one of my close male friends fancies one of…
Dear Mary: How can I stop my husband overeating?
Q. Some older American friends take me and my husband out to dinner once a year when they are over…
Dear Mary: Can I ask our hosts to look for my husband’s tooth in the flowerbed?
Q. My 74-year-old husband was having drinks in the garden of some young clients when he bit down on an…
Dear Mary: How do I tell my neighbours I’m too busy to stop for a chat?
Q. My parents are abroad for two months and as my flatmates in London are all, like me, working from…
Dear Mary: How do I stop a mutual friend giving my contact details to a man I don’t like?
Q. Everyone was divine at a very jolly lunch I attended in the Cotswolds with the exception of one person,…
Dear Mary: How do we say no to a neighbour who wants to use our pool?
Q. I was billeted for a party in Norfolk with a couple previously unknown to me. They were more than…
Dear Mary: How do I avoid getting waylaid at a packed party?
Q. I have found parties frustrating this month because they have been too crowded. Is there a polite way to…
Dear Mary: How do I get my cleaner to put everything back in its proper place?
Q. This year once again my company took a small group of clients to lunch at Royal Ascot. Our guests…
Dear Mary: How do I get a party invitation from the friend who thinks I snubbed him?
Q. I have heard news of a forthcoming party which I would really love to attend. The problem is that…
Dear Mary: Must I call my new partner my ‘boyfriend’ when we’re in our seventies?
Q. My girlfriend and I have started using a personal trainer for some joint sessions at our local gym; the…
Dear Mary: my pool guests are outstaying their welcome
Q. A close friend, who has lost most of her income in recent years, has done something disfiguring to a…
Dear Mary: how can we get a neighbour to acknowledge our kind deed?
Q. As a mildly famous professional cook, I agreed to judge a children’s cake-baking competition at the summer fête of…
Dear Mary: How should I handle summer invitations when I might get a better offer?
Q. In order to raise money for a worthwhile cause, I have agreed to open my garden for the first…
Dear Mary: Should house guests pay to charge their electric cars?
Q. My wife’s father, who she adored, has died and she is to be his sole beneficiary. She intends to…
Dear Mary: How do I dodge my village’s Jubilee tug-of-war contest?
Q. I’m 28 and lucky enough to own a four-bed house in Notting Hill. I let three of the rooms…
Dear Mary: How do we stop friends dropping by without calling?
Q. Some years ago, much to the surprise of our many friends in London, my husband and I moved to…
Dear Mary: how do I alert my neighbour to my generosity?
Q. We went for lunch over the bank holiday with the parents of one of my son’s schoolfriends. We had…
Dear Mary: How do I get back the book I lent to a friend?
Q. As a publisher, I have been fortunate to discover an unpublished writer who is the author of some truly…
Dear Mary: How do I stop my father’s girlfriend boiling a full kettle for one cup of tea?
Q. Financially successful friends have kindly invited my husband and me to stay for a week in France. Our problem…
