Toothless inquiries

Sir: You rightly say that inquiries in Britain have become a form of cover-up (‘The politics of panic’, June 3). This is clear as we contemplate the delay in reporting on the Grenfell Tower fire of 2017, the £200 million spent on the Bloody Sunday report published 38 years after the event, the seven-year delay in concluding the Chilcot inquiry, and the shaming fact that Sweden has reported on its handling of Covid before our inquiry has even begun. 

Instead of spending costly parliamentary and civil service time and astronomical sums on expensive lawyers and experts looking backwards and learning too little far too late from inquiries, our resources should be employed to focus on the future to resolve the long-term problems that are neglected by politicians who seek re-election every four or five years. Their priorities should include national security, stemming sewage and water leaks, fixing our broken justice system, social care, the NHS, potholed highways, cladding on tower blocks and asbestos in classrooms, instead of leaving these problems for future generations to deal with while parliamentarians kick the can down the road by setting up yet another useless and toothless inquiry to no productive purpose at unacceptable taxpayers’ expense.

Trevor Lyttleton

London NW11

Electric dreams

Sir: We do not need a protracted and futile post-Covid inquiry – Lionel Shriver has summed everything up in four pithy phrases in her latest article (‘Let’s rise up in our road rage’, 3 June). ‘Economically self-destructive, socially disastrous, politically despotic and medically idiotic regime’: case closed. Now let’s move on to deal with new items of idiocy, focusing on ‘net zero’. In the fixation with electric cars, has anyone considered how people dependent on secondhand cars are to remain mobile for work in future? I don’t anticipate a thriving market in secondhand electric cars.

I live in a care home in a delightful part of west Suffolk, where no public transport system exists. The staff have to use their own vehicles, all of which are secondhand petrol- and diesel-engined. They are also suffering under the burdens of rising fuel costs for their cars and domestic heating. Additionally, they are at increasing risk of being seriously inconvenienced by road flooding because of dwindling funding of drainage from local authorities and the Environment Agency. Perhaps they will have to depend on horses in future – but of course horses are flatulent creatures, so methane discharges will increase. 

James Dent

Brent Eleigh, Suffolk

Hainsworth Mill

Sir: I was intrigued by Martin Vander Weyer’s suggestion (Any other business, 13 May) that the Hainsworth Mill at Pudsey should become part of a British luxury group to rival the likes of LVMH. My great-great-great-great grandfather Abimilech ‘Old-Bim’ Hainsworth started the business aged 14; 240 years later, my extended family and I currently have no plans to sell. If Martin hasn’t had the opportunity to visit the mill, I’m sure it could be arranged the next time he is in Yorkshire.

Charlie Hainsworth,

Zurich

Sitzpinklers

Sir: I was much amused by Toby Young’s comments on sitzpinkling (No sacred cows, 27 May). As an adjunct, I quote a maxim well known to physics students: ‘No matter how you shake and squeeze, the last few drops go down your knees.’ This was jocularly and erroneously known as Archimedes’ last principle.

John Blakey

Heaton Moor, Greater Manchester

Sitting comfortably

Sir: While some men may baulk at the idea of sitting down to pee, sleep experts recommend ‘not waking up the brain’ when getting up in the middle of the night for that call of nature. Not turning on lights, keeping one’s eyes half-closed, sitting down to pee, and washing hands can all be done in the dark, thus minimising sleep interruption. 

Bob Day

Adelaide, South Australia

Cheese injury

Sir: I read with amusement the article by Mark Mason on British folk sports (Books, 3 June). Last week we advertised for sale on eBay a wheelchair in very good condition. The same day we received a message from a gentleman from Texas. He was staying in Cheltenham and had travelled over to take part in the cheese rolling on Cooper’s Hill and as a result had broken his ankle in three places. He was delighted with his acquisition and the fact that he was treated in the local hospital without charge. He was last seen happily drinking in the local pub.

Martin Sobey

Evesham, Worcs

Banana break

Sir: I was with Charles Moore in Ukraine (Notes, 3 June) and had the pleasure of filming him eat a banana while my friend Kolya demonstrated how to operate a semi-automatic safely (the perils of not scheduling a lunch break). Charles mentions that Ukrainians affectionately Ukrainianised Boris Johnson’s surname to ‘Johnsoniuk’. This is also a play on his Instagram handle, which is @borisjohnsonuk. Ukrainians are not ones to let an invasion get in the way of a good pun.

Benedict Westenra

By email

Crüelty

Sir: Michael Hann’s savage disdain for Mötley Crüe (Arts, 3 June) is shared by Half Man Half Biscuit. Their song ‘Upon Westminster Bridge’ contains the lyrics: ‘Help Mrs Medlicott, I don’t know what to do,/ I’ve only got three bullets and there’s four of Mötley Crüe.’

Richard Briand

Leek, Staffs

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